I fell down a well and was stuck for four days.
I wasn't too worried at first because the nights were warm,
I knew I could go without food, and there was plenty of water.
But that all changed on the second day
When my attempt to fart turned into a liquid dooky.
I took equestrian lessons on a hot summer day.
I dressed smartly in loose shorts and no undies
To let the breezes pass through.
Bouncing around on the horse's back
My sitting bones anvilled my unrestrained juevos
Into a screaming lump of Silly Putty.
I told my wife to start wearing skirts more often
Because her ass looked really big in her jeans.
I grabbed the tail of a cow that had spend the day
Eating nothing but fresh green grass.